Life just sucked today.
A TV show I was pitching for tanked without a whimper. An animation film I was looking forward to making died without so much as a last few meaningful words. My editor of a potential book hasn't got back to me about a chapter I wrote (and in my current frame of mind, it was a crappy chapter and everyone hates me). And then, as the icing from Hell on a cake of brimstone, my mother says, "Maybe you should give up all this media thing and come stay with me."
Yep, I had the 'our daughter lives in the room above the garage' moment. Crap.
The thing is, she tapped right into the core of my fears - what if I'm really not good enough? In an industry that's spilling over with mediocrity and some flashes of real genius, what if I'm one of those that needs to be shunted out, for the greater good? What if... what if... what if I'm the wrong person in the right place at the right time?
Aaaarrrrrrggghh!
On the bright side, I also ran for 20 minutes straight. Okay, it doesn't sound like much but you have to understand that I'm not a runner at all and I haven't been to the gym in months... Sure, I collapsed, and it's nowhere near the 21kms of the marathon I dream of getting through some day, but it was a start.
And a couple of total strangers made me laugh today. More on that later, even if it is to differentiate the experiences as being portentous or merely noteworthy.
So not a total disaster. I have been given two days to mope by my friends. I better get down to it.
A TV show I was pitching for tanked without a whimper. An animation film I was looking forward to making died without so much as a last few meaningful words. My editor of a potential book hasn't got back to me about a chapter I wrote (and in my current frame of mind, it was a crappy chapter and everyone hates me). And then, as the icing from Hell on a cake of brimstone, my mother says, "Maybe you should give up all this media thing and come stay with me."
Yep, I had the 'our daughter lives in the room above the garage' moment. Crap.
The thing is, she tapped right into the core of my fears - what if I'm really not good enough? In an industry that's spilling over with mediocrity and some flashes of real genius, what if I'm one of those that needs to be shunted out, for the greater good? What if... what if... what if I'm the wrong person in the right place at the right time?
Aaaarrrrrrggghh!
On the bright side, I also ran for 20 minutes straight. Okay, it doesn't sound like much but you have to understand that I'm not a runner at all and I haven't been to the gym in months... Sure, I collapsed, and it's nowhere near the 21kms of the marathon I dream of getting through some day, but it was a start.
And a couple of total strangers made me laugh today. More on that later, even if it is to differentiate the experiences as being portentous or merely noteworthy.
So not a total disaster. I have been given two days to mope by my friends. I better get down to it.
1 comment:
So, a few days have passed since this was posted, so the world will be very different today, am late for the moping, etc, but I am up for some writing, what say you? :)
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