Sunday, May 2, 2010

Missed You

If there was a Craigslist kind of thing in Mumbai, this is what i would be writing in the Missed Connections section:

You - in a purple tie-dye kurta and a backpack
Me - in a purple beaded top and blue jeans
At the Landmark store, going through the DVD titles
You - of live action films
Me - of animated features
while we both mini-bee-bopped to the muzak and i wondered if you'd like to maybe watch a film, while i nuzzle your neck and drown in the musky aftershave you use as you shave around your cute goatee that just goes to accentuate your perfect jawline and the ironic lips, while you marveled at how perfectly my body fit yours and how you don't ever want to let go.

You're probably 24. That would make me a student of the Cougar school of thought.



A-Girl said...

Hi S,

In your long dating history, have you been able to figure out what men really want? I have dated Americans, Europeans, Turkish, Arab and Indian men, and this is my conclusion. What men want across the board is the same thing. What men want is UNCONDITIONAL FREEDOM. (yeah, some women want that too- probably you are one of them, but more 'men' fall into this category hence the reason why so many relationships fail.

This is what I think. Please blog your views on it.

I call it the 'truth about dogs and men'

In order to have a happy stress-free relationship with any guy for any length of time, the girl must...

- never ask him why he didn't call when he was supposed to
- never ask him why he was late
- never expect him to call when he knows he will be late
- never question him about his female friends
- never show that you are uncomfortable about him being in touch with his ex.
- never feel upset when he chooses to 'not' meet with you as he is supremely busy with this deadline, but yet ends up going out with his male buddies that evening.
- never question why he didn't find time to send even a one liner reply to your email.
- never ask him why he used to send a barrage of texts and emails at the start of the relationship, and now that it is easy for them to meet anytime at his place or yours, he does not find 'time' to email anymore.
- never be upset when you want to have sex but he doesn't
- never be upset if he doesn't invite you to that weekend snowboarding trip with his friends
-never get upset if he smells bad
- or if he doesn't want to cuddle.

If you are do all of the above then you are normal.

After ascertaining that you come in this normal category, you must then be beautiful, have a nice smile and a reasonably nice body.

Its then, and only then can you experience a happy stress-free relationship.

This exposition was deduced after listening to true stories of about 100 of my female friends, and friends of friends from different cultures, societies and countries. The saddest part is that there is nothing funny about this conclusion, if you come to think of it, sadly this is absolutely true. If you are a woman and have experienced a relationship, where you were happy without doing the above, you are one lucky woman.

-A Girl

Searcher said...


a girl could be single :)

But honestly A Girl, if a woman was to make a similar list, you'd see its just as unrealistic and demeaning as this one. I think its upto two people to decide to be nice to each other within their own limitations, that makes a relationship work. nothing else.